Kitchen Pyrotechnics

Why is it that men seize on massive firepower to do tasks that more moderate temperatures can do just as well? Is it the need for speed, or just a love of gadgetry?

Example du jour: Julian bought an item called a Searzall. This is a flame diffuser that attaches to a home propane blowtorch. According to the videos, one can sear steaks and fish, roast peppers, and caramelize crème brûlée. He had to go to the hardware store to get a blowtorch and propane tanks so he could try it out.

I have serious concerns about the use of powerful blowtorches in the kitchen, and ours in particular. It’s a glorified galley with way too much wood. It’s one thing to use one of these suckers in a commercial kitchen, quite another in a condo. In addition, I did a week’s rotation in the Parkland Memorial Hospital Burn Unit many years ago. One doesn’t leave that setting without a deep respect for fire and what it can do to the human body.

Julian assembled the blowtorch-Searzall. The instructions called for breaking in the apparatus by running it for exactly two minutes to oxidize the palladium diffuser screens. I made him do it in the driveway well away from our wood-frame abode. (Our neighbors were no doubt relieved.)

The first test of the Searzall followed shortly thereafter. I needed to roast and peel some Hatch chiles. Julian set a chile on a baking rack over a cookie sheet on the kitchen counter and turned on the burn. It was slow going. After several minutes of blasting when only a few charred skin bubbles on the chile had appeared, I asked, “Should I start the gas grill?” He nodded.

The Searzall may be fine for crème brûlée or other small tasks that don’t take much time, but I wouldn’t trust it to do bulk items like a mess of chiles or several steaks that had been cooked in the sous vide.